Melt Down Day

Last Saturday wasn't a good knitting day, nor was the day before, New Years Day. NOTHING knit in the last few months has been made without a major number of errors, without tons of frogging and redoing. Every little thing, even easy knitting has been hard won. After 5 restarts I finally gave up Beach Glass, frogged a simple mitt that was messed up, and in total discouragement kicked my knitting bag across the room. The only thing I have to show for it is a bruise on my shin. Smith was horror stricken when I vowed never to knit again.

The doctors had warned me, as had several friends, that healing from heart surgery was an emotional journey, and it has been just that. Some days I feel on the verge…the verge of tears, or anger, or frustration, or self pity, or depression and, usually, I let the feeling run its course and feel better by the next day. Saturday was a melt down day.

I left the house (in a bit of a snit) to do a little shopping and have lunch with Shelley. I knew she'd lift my spirits. After I left the house Smith called her, and in turn Cheryl, to let them know I was in crisis and needed an intervention. As I stood in Shelley's living room Cheryl called and, together, they sweetly, caringly offered the same advice…return to the basics, start simple and rebuild the pathways in the brain. It made sense, it renewed my resolve.  Shelley knew I had a simple project in mind and Cheryl suggested I follow MustaaVillaa's lead and knit  a beautifully simple garter shawl.

While I didn't knit anything on Saturday, I did upright my knitting bag and reorganized it. The next day, after a little yarn shopping, I started the new shawl.  It's going to be really cool (and exciting), so stay tuned and see how it goes.

 

Comments

[Susan Voegtly (aka CintiSue - first a quilter, now a knitter/quilter)]

Well if I were you...I'd give that boy a really big kiss!

[Kristin]

Good friends are quite simply the best thing in the world...and it's even better when our loved ones know how much we need them.

I'm sending happy thoughts your way!

[Teyani]

bless Smith for recognizing that your friends needed to get a 'peek behind the mask', and told them of your melt down.
love the deep blood red of the new shawl.
(hugs)

[Annie]

Sometimes it's all you can do to remember how to breathe. Think of this as the comfort food of knitting, and snuggle in it when it's complete. So glad you have good friends close by to count on!

[Julie Law]

Take care and don't get too discouraged. I also had surgery and when I tried to knit in the week following, I just couldn't do it. I started a scarf 5 times and finally thought: I just can't do this. I'm not smart enough anymore to figure it out. But you know what? It did come back gradually. I think it was the anesthetic. It WILL all come back and you WILL be as fine a knitter as ever. "Knit on with hope and confidence..." EZ. I love your red color.
Julie

[Laurie]

Recovery is a process, as uneasy and variable as knitting progress. So much disruption. It would be like a caveperson healing from a sabertooth tiger attack. The clan would take care of her for months and months while tissues knit together.

Love Smith. Tell him I said so. I think kicking the knitting bag was excellent therapy.